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Social Media on Your Own Terms

Feb 20, 2020

Somewhere along the lines we got advice from experts in their fields confused as must-do’s from the mayors of social media. 


We have this pressure to do everything that’s been recommended in that exact way, instead of taking it as a suggestion that could work for us in a specific situation, that could work at a later time, or that could work in a different way. Or maybe not at all. 


By feeling that pressure to do it just "right" it usually results in one of two things:


1.) We have a list of must-do’s a mile long that leaves us stressed and wondering how we’re ever going to implement it all. 


2.) We do our best to implement it all, but it’s not working for us and then get frustrated at ourselves, at that specific strategy, at a specific platform, at our business in general, beat ourselves up, and then start the downward spiral wondering if we’re even cut out for this. 


Instead of dealing with all that, stop trying to implement every “good” idea. Don’t worry that you’re going to miss out on the next big thing (LinkedIn, Instagram Stories, email, Facebook Groups, ChatBots, Pinterest, blogging, podcasting, creating digital products, starting a membership, etc. etc. etc.)


When you hear about how a specific platform or strategy worked for someone else, before you even spend another minute starting to figure out how it would work for you, stop, take a deep breath and ask yourself if that would align with how you want to spend your days. 


And if you’re not sure, start there. 


Take time to journal out how you’d like to spend your days. Some people are happiest sitting at a desk, listening to music with a candle going, while others might be happiest with just a little time of that and spending the rest of their days out and about. Maybe you’re into the hustle mode right now and that feels fun and exciting or maybe you’re in a place of slowing down and being more present. Maybe you’re hyper-focused on a work project right now, or are in more of a season where your family, friends or a personal matter of yours is requiring more time. 


There’s no right or wrong and it’s not permanent. You can be one way now and change next week if you want. 


But that’s important to know. 


Before you can start living on your own terms, you need to get clear on what those terms are. 


And then once you have them, respect them and use them as a filter for every new idea or recommendation you get. 


I’ve heard some social media experts talk about using the time in the grocery store line to respond to and send DM’s, but if you’re in a place of wanting to be present with less time on a phone or have kids hanging all over you don’t beat yourself up or feel like you’re not working hard enough if you don’t do that. 


I talk a lot about showing your face in your Instagram feed. There’s people who are successful using Instagram in their own way by just using text graphics and soley using Stories to show up in that way. 


There’s successful people who don’t use social media at all and only use a daily email to connect with their audience. 


There’s people who don’t have Facebook Groups that are successful. 


All kinds of people with different personalities, different interests, different ways they want to work and live their lives are creating marketing strategies that match up with those unique things and are still making money, being a helpful resource and sharing a valuable product. 


You get to have that too. 


If you don’t want to post everyday, don’t post everyday because someone said you had to to keep up with the algorithm. 


If you don’t want to be on LinkedIn, don’t be on LinkedIn because someone (me?) said it was the next big thing. 


If you don’t like doing videos, don’t start a YouTube channel because someone said it was the biggest search engine next to Google. 


If you don’t want to share “vulnerable” posts, you don’t have to open up about your biggest failures or struggles you’re having because someone said that makes you more connected to your audience. 


If you don’t want to plan out your content in advance, you don’t have to. 


Stop doing crap you don’t want to do and guilt tripping yourself when you don’t do things you don’t want to do


Work and live on YOUR OWN TERMS. 


You are the boss. 


You get to make the decisions. 


You don’t have to do it all. 


AND you get to still be successful. 


When I hear from an expert or guru that has a method or specific strategy for doing something that I need to start, but am not really feeling it, I’ve gotten into the habit of asking, “Do I know anyone else NOT doing this but still having success?” The answer is always, yes and then I can let that “must-do” go without the guilt or pressure or thinking I’m missing out on anything. 


Get clear on what your  terms are for the time being and then start living accordingly. 


To being the boss of you. 


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